Remembrances of Old Time Preachers – Whispering, Howling, Crying

1901

Hot Tamales
By Walt Mason

The person who is waxing old notices a great difference between the church services of these times, and the services in the grand old days when he was a boy. The preacher of the old time generally had an elaborate pulpit to stand in. Sometimes the pulpit was away up on the wall, like a clock; sometimes it was on a platform; but there was always a pulpit, and it was often imposing in the massive grandeur of its architecture. The pastor of the old days generally pounded and kicked the pulpit when he got warmed up, so it had to be strong; the pastor of the church we attended about forty centuries ago used to attack the pulpit in a frenzied manner that often scared us. The old-time pastor favored a style of oratory that is seldom heard nowadays. He whispered for a while and then he howled for a while; and often he wept. And there was practically no end to his sermon. He thought he wasn't earning his stipend unless he preached until his voice gave out, or a blood vessel broke. The modern pastor frequently has nothing more like a pulpit than a little stand or desk; he speaks to the congregation in a conversational tone, and he keeps one eye on the clock, so as to saw off his discourse in proper time. As a consequence it is really no great ordeal to go to church. It's often possible to sleep while the sermon is being preached, and wake up in time for the music, which is generally good.

The pastors of these time are far more considerate than the old time clergymen used to be. If a man went to sleep in church a quarter of a century ago, the pastor would slam the Bible down on the pulpit, and roar, and make such a noise that the sleeper would wake. Nowadays, when a pastor sees one of his flock asleep, he lowers his voice in order that the slumberer may not be disturbed. The time is coming when there will be no preaching in church. Preaching is superfluous and often annoying. Music is the stuff. There is more religion in music than in any quantity of sermons.

I'm always glad to go to church,
And hear the word, and then
I'm always glad to take my hat
And get outdoors again.

—Lincoln Evening News, Lincoln, NE, Feb. 12, 1901, p. 4.